My Small Town Fairy Tale

 My wedding day was one of the most magical and memorable days of my life. I know most girls dream of that perfect day and I have to brag and say I had that. God truly shined his love down on us that day. I thought I would share some of the pictures. Hope y'all enjoy! :)

Wood Slats and Tears

Staring up at the wooden slats underneath her bed, she listens intently to the sounds coming from outside the bedroom. Did she hear footfalls in the kitchen? Her palms are all sweaty and she can feel her t-shirt sticking to her back. "Please, please don't come in here tonight," she prays, but he usually does. Creeping in like some lion on the prowl to consume its next prey. That's what she was, his prey, something he could use and manipulate. If only I were stronger, she thought, then I could stand up and fight like men do.

She reached for her diary to write down her thoughts when the door to the bedroom opens. She freezes, tucks her legs up praying she was invisible under the bed in the darkness. A sickening feeling pools in her stomach and she fears she will vomit thinking of what will happen if he finds her. He's drunk and smells terrible. He comes closer to her bed and she can hear him touching the blankets trying to find her. Her heart is beating so fast she feared he would hear. Not breathing or moving a muscle she clings to her knees and closes her eyes as the man moves about the room, searching.

He was searching to destroy her, all of her. What could she do? She had to think. Think of something to use to fight him off when he found her. It was hopeless. She always fought but he would win.

He found her then, like he always does, used her up and left her feeling empty.Empty, a big zero, someone no one cared about.

Wisdom Teeth

So I had been told for months that I needed to consider getting my wisdom teeth taken out. My aunt is a dental hygienist and said since they were impacted I needed to get them out asap to avoid any future discomfort.

OK, I thought doesn't sound to bad from how she described it and other friends had told me how easy their surgery went. My fiance recommended a dentist he had gone to and I set up an appointment. To make this story short its been five days since the removal of all four of my wisdom teeth and I just left the dentist office where they had to restitch and pack my bottom right socket. I don't know if any of you all have heard of a dry socket but it's the most painful thing I have experienced so far in my 21 years of life. A dry socket occurs because the blood clot normally expected to occupy the extraction site and initiate its healing has instead been lost. The net result is that the healing of the socket becomes delayed.

I haven't slept good since the surgery. I can't eat anything solid which has caused me to lose weight. I am utterly miserable. Needless to say I really wish I hadn't done this. I cannot wait for the pain to stop so I can eat normal foods again. Especially pizza :)

The Start of Something Great

My fiance and I finally had the time to get some engagement pictures done. We picked the property where we will soon live and eventually build our house and new lives together. Here is a peek at a few.

  

http://www.marchellemosleyphotography.com/ 

 

A Single Moment

I suppose I need to give some updates as to what has been going on since my last blog. In my last blog I wrote about my boyfriend leaving me in Tennessee. I have to admit staying 400 miles away from each other was not ideal. That being said, I now live back in Indiana and am currently planning my wedding. Yes! The love of my life proposed on a sunny Thursday afternoon. Sometimes I find myself reliving that moment. It was a moment every girl dreams of.

I had been in class all morning and hating it. He had arrived late the night before and was at my house laying tile. I couldn't wait for class to end so I could be with him. I drive like crazy to get home. When I pull into the driveway I get out of the car (trying to act nochalant in case he's watching). I walk into the house and expect to see him in the kitchen. He's not there? I call out, "Hey babe, Where are you?" I hear from the back of the house, "In here." I honestly thought he was in the bathroom doing his business if you catch my drift. I walk through the living room and turn the corner that leads to the bedroom. My heart stops. I can't breath. There he is, the man who makes my life have purpose down on one knee, with a box opened in his palm. He's smiling and shaking. I hear the words although they sound faint to my ears, "Will you marry me?" I look at him and say dumbly, "Are you joking?" He laughs nervously and says sweetly, "No i'm not, will you marry me?" Tears fill my eyes and my heart starts to race. I say yes and drop to my knees as he pulls me to him. He starts to cry and he puts the ring on my hand. It's so perfect. That moment was perfect.

GONE

The day is finally here. D day, he leaves me here today. I walk him outside after holding on to him for an hour inside the house. I try to remember everything I can about him, his smell, the way his face looks, the way it feels when his arms are around me, and the way he kisses me. I know in my heart I won't be able to feel or see any of this for at least a month. At this moment I feel like a knife has been shoved into my chest. I do not want him to drive away. We stand beside his truck in the yard clinging to each other, my cheek is against his cheek and I am holding on with all my might. I suddenly feel wetness on my cheek. I pull back to see tears coming from his beautiful blue eyes, my heart is full of love for this man. I begin to cry tears of happiness. He loves me as much as I love him! I feel as if I can fly off this earth. He feels the pain I feel at the thought of leaving. I hug him even tighter if that's possible. I don't ever want to lose this feeling. We kiss a hundred times more, and he begins to climb into his truck. I hold onto his hand and he pulls me against him again like he never wants to let me go and I don't ever want him to. I know he must go, and so does he. After another couple minutes of kissing and crying we finally part and he shuts the door. As he pulls away he takes my heart with him.

The Dip Spit Disaster....

I am the first to admit when I am wrong in a situation, but I pride myself on being right. So I finally have a story where I made a complete fool of myself over a Styrofoam cup. 


It all begins when my love, Jared, gets off work last Tuesday evening. We had made plans to go hang out at a friends house, so after eating dinner we pile into the truck. We're having nice conversation driving down the road when I look down and see a small Styrofoam cup sitting in the console sporting a huge lipstick print on it. My mind automatically jumps to conclusions. First I know good and well I don't put my lips on Styrofoam cups nor do I buy that small size at the gas station. So, I question him about it. He immediately says I have no idea and starts getting angry. To me this is him acting as if he's guilty of something. 


Well I give him all I got, yelling and screaming at him all the time thinking he has been cheating on me. Jared is getting more and more angry as well, screaming back at me. Then he says something that cuts straight to my heart. He says, "Why don't you just go home!" 


Now let me remind you I moved to Indiana in February of this year from my home town in Tennessee to be with Jared and for him to say he wants me to go back cut me to the core. I'm so upset he said that it just fuels my anger!


Then I decide to investigate the cup all in my own stupidity. I start to look into the cup full of dip spit to try and see what kind of drink was in it before because I knew if it was coke it most certainly was not my cup. As I tip the cup up to look Jared hits a huge pot hole and the dip spit spills all down my front! It spills into my hair and on my coach bag! I couldn't believe it for a second and was shocked, I hate dipping and the smell was horrid. I feel like crying and screaming all at the same time. My anger is way up on there at this point. 


He hands me a rag so I can wipe myself off and begins to turn around to take me back home to change, I calmly ask him again who the cup belongs to, believing with all my might that he knows and just won't tell me. Then he suddenly bursts out, "IT'S YOURS!!" 


My mind does a flip flop and I remember now where the damn cup came from. It was mine from a birthday party we went to that previous weekend. I was humiliated on the spot for reacting the way I did. I'm sure the look on my face was priceless for Jared in that moment. I was wrong for once and he was right to my shame. 


When we get back to the house I'm on the verge of tears and I walk in and tell Jared's family what happened and begin to laugh and cry hysterically. How could I have not remembered that cup was mine and why did I want to believe Jared was cheating? 


I'm just glad I could admit I was wrong when need be. I'm also extremely glad he was not cheating for it truly would have broke my heart. However he will not let me live down that day and I am still apologizing for yelling at him for no reason. This situation made me realize maybe sometimes we should believe our man.